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Playlist.

So i saw that Stephanie Meyer, author of the Twilight Saga, created a playlist of the songs that inpired each book. I found this very interesting due to the fact that I too am inspired by a lot of the music i listen to when it comes to stories. To be honest, whenever i listen to a song, i try to create a music video in my head of the characters from the story, and if there are no characters fit the song genre/message i create some other character in some other universe, and suddenly i have an entirely different story idea, and then i get into trouble because i have another story idea on my shoulders.

(Warning: Long explanation Starting here, Skip to "Note" if you are not interested.)

To give you an example, during the last year i was listening to the band Tool quite a bit, and because of this, a substantial amount of material for my Novel (Which i will here on refer to as FLAF). Around the end of the summer of last year i also started listening to a band called "Porcelain and the Tramps" (Procelain) which through me for a complete and utter loop when it comes to story ideas. FLAF is a steampunk adventure with a lot of spiritual and political views that are almost directly from Tool's surreal lyrics, and when i listened to Porcelain, i'm hit with very strong and empowering chick-rock! I'm not saying that FLAF doesn't have empowering women, but it's a different type of empowering that Porcelain speaks of and that is why it confused me. Therefore i came up with another story idea to fit the music. I create a completely different set of characters, plot elements, villians, and cities. The problem with this was that i now had two completely opposite story ideas.

(Note: Explanation ends Here)

Since this happens with pretty much each style of music i listen to, i get too many ideas going through my head. This is why i decided to create a playlist of the songs that inspire each story, just so if i ever need to get into the zone for writing for one story or another, i am able to!

I'm still working on it now, so hopefully i can finish it and post it so you guys can see what goes through my head!

Lame...

This is going to be somewhat of a rant/vent/whatever-you-want-to-call-it.

Now, I don't mean to sound like a total bitch, but I am going to have to say it. I have been overweight pretty much all my life. I have always wanted to get in better shape, or just loose enough weight to go down in clothes sizes, and in the summer of 2008 I almost did it!

Unfortunately, as life would have it, something happened that deeply impacted my life, and it threw me into a depression that I have just started to get out of. During this time period, i gained quite a bit of weight. If i remember correctly, in the middle of Summer08 i weighed 250 pounds having lost 20 pounds during the first half of the Summer. But now, after weighing myself for the first time since, i weigh 300 pounds.

The worst part about it is that ever since i weighed myself, i started to feel it! I feel like i am weighed down, like i can;t breath. I feel the flab in my body, and I see how large my girth has gotten, and it makes me feel HORRIBLE!

Now this brings me to why i am writing this blog. I want to lose weight. I want to get in better shape. I want to be the Tyler Durden that every man has in their head. But I can't. Or at least it seems that way.

I pretty much am writing this because i wish to turn over a new leaf. I want to start controlling my diet. If i can do that, I think the rest will happen on it's own. I just need to take that first step! But it seems harder to me than it should. I know i can do it! I KNOW I CAN, because i did it once before!

Ugh...

let's see what happens...